Power Moves

I had an experience with a member of Holly’s herd and friend of mine during a weekend at the Ranch.  While I was processing some of the recent developments in my life, Holly was grazing peacefully. I guess you could argue that she was listening, but the way her ears flicker back and forth and how close she stayed I can’t help but feel that she was. 

My friend asked a question, and my answer was: “I wasn’t wanted. And I was fighting to be wanted. I’m always fighting to feel wanted.” And right at that moment, Raven charged right through the space in between Holly and I.  His ears were pinned, his teeth bared and it was clear he wanted me to move. And Raven is about 18 hands of youthful and powerful Friesan energy so I didn’t argue. Raven didn’t want me there.  And I moved.

See the metaphor?

And it was okay. Raven and I have a good relationship, and I don’t mind that right then he didn’t want me where I was. I respected him, but I also respected ME. I moved away and respected myself.  That was not the appropriate time to stand my ground. If I had tried to fight for staying where I was I would have probably ended up with a horse-teeth shaped bruise on my arm. Painful.  (Not to over-do the metaphors, but that’s a good illustration of what happened when I tried to fight to be wanted. Except it wasn’t just my arm that was bruised…)

And Raven, maybe unknowingly, gave me the reinforcement I needed to understand that sometimes it’s okay to move away when you’re not wanted somewhere. There are times that it’s okay to respect yourself enough to move away, even though not everyone will see it as a power move, I know that I made a move that respected myself.  I valued myself enough that when given a choice I kept myself safe and I didn’t give in and I didn’t give up any of who I was. That sounds like a power move to me.