Comfort

Holly has been my greatest teacher. The lessons I learn and the moments we share are precious. And I rarely go a day without thinking of her.

When I have been away for a long time, I sometimes forget the comfort I feel in the presence of my zebra. The simplicity of being together is a welcome refuge.

Holly's loyal grandfather passed away recently. A wise white gelding who was absolute comfort. He served as Holly's guide and her protector. Without him, she has in many ways lost her comfort. When she needed to rest, she knew that Thunderheart would watch over her as she lay down to sleep. Without him, she feels she must be alert all the time. My grandfather told me that she has barely been sleeping and finally she gets so tired she just collapses.

I cannot ever really 'turn off'. Everywhere I go and in every situation, the energy, that most people can't feel, makes it difficult for me to settle. My constant awareness would serve me better as a zebra than it does as a human. But when I'm with Holly, I can share some of the responsibility of being alert. We can support each other. Sharing space means we have less to watch out for on our own. And when we need a little support we can look for each other. Often, in large groups Holly will seek me out and move close to watch things unfold. It doesn't even take words or touch to make the connection, I can just be near.

Why is that comfort so hard to find anywhere else? What does it say about me that am most at peace in the presence of a wild animal? Holly is different, and our relationship is special. But she's far away and I can't simply walk out into her pasture and kneel down in the grass and tell Holly I'm tired and I need to rest.

But how I wish I could.

I seek that comfort in so many other places and people. And it's never quite the same. And sometimes, it's not safe. There are always lions looking for a tired zebra on her own.

But how lucky am I that I know just where to find my cure. I need to remember I can lean on memories of moments of comfort shared with Holly. And I know that I am never completely alone - I know a zebra who sometimes asks the same question.